My Honey Bear


It's been nine months now since we called an end to our relationship and still you occupy my thoughts. At night, I toss and turn, trying so hard to forget you, then fall asleep and find you still there, haunting me in my dreams. I remember a time when I could not wait to go to bed and think about our times together. Now those sweet memories are nightmares which torment me.

I wish that I knew the words that I could have said that would have kept you with me. If I could find them now, would it be too late? Have you moved on so quickly? I know time has passed, but for me it seems only yesterday that we were laughing and planning our lives together. I know you were scared, but so was I. You are probably scared still; I know I am. I wish I had you to comfort me. I wish I could also comfort you.

There are so many things I wish I hadn't done and so many things I wish I had done. I wish I knew the words to tell you how I feel. I'm certain there is something I should have said. If I had found the words, I could be holding you instead of writing a letter.

My mother always told me, "If you find the one you think you're supposed to be with, don't let him get away. If you do, you'll regret it for the rest of your life." I already regret. I loved you so much and still do. It wouldn't have mattered what we had to struggle through, we could have made it. Wouldn't the struggle have been better than separation? My heart tells me that it would have and I want to try.

I miss you so much, Honey Bear. Please think about our getting together.